Category Archives: Counseling

Why Telling Our Stories Matters | Leaving Egypt Bonus Track

October 3, 2012

“What we hunger for perhaps more than anything else is to be known in our full humanness, and yet that is often just what we also fear more than anything else. It is important to tell at least from time … Continue reading

Men, Women, and the Way of the Cross

May 10, 2012

Some pastors have been asking me to blog a bit on my thoughts re: complementarianism, egalitarianism, male/female roles, why it’s become such a polarizing topic, and perhaps even why it’s become a new litmus test of fidelity to the Gospel.  … Continue reading

The Secret to Good Counseling

February 17, 2012

What is already in your client is far more powerful than anything you can give them. Consider that for a moment. We’ve made our words, our precise articulations, our interventions, our expertise far more important than the hidden treasure within. … Continue reading

Where are you?

February 6, 2012

In that great original story of Genesis, God makes an extraordinary world, places extraordinary creatures in it, and crowns it with his greatest creation of all – human beings – calling them “very good.”  He tells us who we are … Continue reading

Moving Beyond Polarization into Mission

January 23, 2012

I’m moving on. I’ve spent the last decade-plus in the midst of a sad and frustrating polarization.  In other posts, I’ve talked about it as the Emergent-Resurgence polarization.  It’s the newest episode in a long series of polarization-episodes.  We, Christians, … Continue reading

(Christian) Family Dynamics

January 6, 2012

We all know Newton’s third law:  For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Or, at the least, we know it in our relationships.  Family Systems theorists have argued for decades that a principle of polarization exists in … Continue reading

The God who looks you in the eye

December 20, 2011

I can’t look you in the eyes. My client said it to me.  I could hear him crying, but he buried his face in his hands. He was drowning in shame from acting out, yet again. I’m repulsive. And then … Continue reading

Why Penn State and Syracuse Matter…

November 28, 2011

At the Leadership for the Church in Mission conference the week before last, Prof. NT Wright ranted against the media obsession with the Penn State scandal.  I get it.  For Wright, the American news media is quick to jump on … Continue reading

To all the women who feel crazy with a narcissist…

November 2, 2011

Dear “Crazy”: Yes, I know you’ve heard that word over and over again.  Remember the night you just couldn’t take it any more?  He wouldn’t listen, but he sat there sitting with that look…you know the look…as if to say, … Continue reading

Pastors Care Too Much

October 11, 2011

I was talking to a fellow professional in the world of psychology today, a seminary professor and a pastor, a man who has evaluated literally hundreds of candidates for ministry.  We were comparing notes.  We’ve both administered tests (like the … Continue reading